Posts tagged shit
Posts tagged shit
there goes my childhood
this is where it all began
It’s like beer goggle syndrome…except the dead end job version.
I just wanted some hot cakes and a friggin McMuffin but and SHABLAM: crazy ass dream!
Here are the details:
At work one of my coworkers was telling me about how her car for stolen from the parking lot a few weeks ago….as she was telling me about it - it happened again. Also this week, I got a ticket for my loving my car on street sweeper day…which is fucking bullshit since up until recently I’ve never even had to bat an eyelash about parking on the street. BOY, did those events influence my dream!
SO, I was dreaming that my neighborhood went to shit & every car that was parked on the street was getting vandalized or stolen. Needless to say it happened to me. First they took my beloved personalized license plate & my tires.
Then while I’m flipping my shit about my plates, I look down the street & there’s cheerleader on cheerleader violence going on - hardcore. Like one of them had a gun & the other did some kinda round about kick & kicked the gun allllllll the way down the street to where I was freakin out. So, the defenseless cheerleader the. pulls a grenade out of nowhere, throws it at the kicker & hits the deck! Next thing you know there cheerleader bits & torn up uniform flying through the air. This scene was like something out of that move Death Proof when the chicks leg comes off in the car accident - like I specifically remember seeing an entire leg fly through the air when the grenade went off.
After that drama, I for some reason had a good ole roll in the mud - like legitimately played in it - with one of my longtime friends, Maggie - random right! So while we’re having a good ole time in the mud both of our cars get stolen and another war zone like view of my street ensues as we go on the hunt for our vehicles. Fade to black….
Like…really McDonalds, WTF did you do to me?!?
I won’t be going to McDonalds again for a whiiiile. I jus wanted to treat myself to some deliciousness & that’s the thanks I get - no fucking thanks!
ugh, I need a drink.
Wtf, how does that even happen?!
All I know is that it did happen & my nipple is not pleased.
story of my life & I still feel sleep deprived. FML